The last four years has enlightened me to an important lesson on social accountability. We are a reflection of everything we don’t like or place blame on. If you can’t see how you’re part of it, or how you’ve contributed to it, let me explain. It’s very easy and convenient placing blame on others or things or movements or political parties. Hell, it takes the responsibility off our backs because I certainly didn’t do “all the bad things” right? It was all “orange man bad”! Wrong. Every single action we take contributes to everyone’s lives and creates the foundation of all of our future.

Now I don’t love Trump as a person. He’s flawed like everyone else. I agreed with most of his policies, but as a human being that makes mistakes and says the wrong things, he had his fair share of cringe worthy moments, many of which were twisted and misinterpreted. However, to blame him or people who supported him for every little issue we are facing in our world right now is irresponsible, inaccurate and childish.

We are all responsible for what we have become in our world. Every time we participate in this modern society, every choice and action we take has led us here to this moment in time. Every scroll through instagram, every tweet, every glance at the news on our phones, every pop culture reference, trend or meme… they’re all connected. We have created the monster, and the monster has become us. Many of us choose not to see it. Many choose to blame others but let me tell you, we’re not monks who’s taken a vow of silence or the Amish that live free of technology and the media. We have fed the monster and given it all it’s strengths and told it our weaknesses and it has wrecked havoc on its creator.

Everyone in the public arena who has a large outlet to voice their opinion and be heard by the masses only says things that they think their followers want to hear and what will fuel their detractors fire. Decades ago when news took longer to circulate, much of the rhetoric happening within politics became diluted to the masses causing less fire to fuel the heat of public opinion. Remember the telephone game? You’d tell someone a message of info and they’d have to relay that info to the next person, and by the time it has been passed 10 times, it’s a totally different message.

Today, every word and statement is available verbatim in real-time to anyone who can access it, mostly on a phone. While this is an amazing feat of technology and progress, human nature has not changed at the same rate. This is a problem. The statement, if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say it at all has been thrown out the window because of the fact that we as a society have embraced the us vs. them way of thinking. Humans are tribal by nature. The news and entertainment industry has thrived and capitalized on this with the proliferation of reality tv and the overgrowing violence in movies and video games that has blurred our reality with technology. These industries thrive on your participation because they’re getting paid for you to watch, engage and share their content. Technology has given us the right to be our own hero’s and vilify anyone else who disagrees or has a different opinion or who the masses points a finger at to “cancel” or “shun”. It’s as simple as clicking a button on your phone.

So how to we take more responsibility for our actions in which we may not be totally aware of? First, any action you take online ensure you are engaging with people as you would in person in the real world. They’re not just photos and names in a box on a screen, they are humans. Do unto others and take the high ground. If you are being attacked online, disengage, take a break. Don’t add fuel to the fire. Allow them to think about their actions with your inaction at the momentArguing with people whose minds you won’t change in the moment on social media does nothing but make the social media companies more money. Second, disengage from social media and the internet as much as possible. As hard as it can be, live your life more in the real-world. Remember, everything you share for free, the social media companies are profiting from. It’s like they are stealing from you, with your permission. Start thinking about positive and constructive conversations you can have with people you may not agree with. Its hard to take the high road and easy to fire back, but if we want to change every aspect of our future, it happens now.